Summer 2008

Well, it's been quite a Summer. Below are some pictures of the girls at various hot spots ending with the first day of school.

Update

Just an update for the folks who occasionally stop by. We've been home for almost 5 months now. I really wish I could call myself 5 months ago and show her these pictures. I might have chilled out a little. Anywho, we're all doing great. Surgery is over and done with and everything is looking great.

Brennan and I had a talk last night about why she didn't have any baby pictures, and why she wasn't with us when she was a baby. She's really mad we didn't get her sooner. For only speaking english for 5 months and only being 5 years old, she is really very emotionally intelligent and expressive. So I tried to tell and draw her story for her. When we got to the part where her birth mother took her to the orphanage her shoulders dropped and she said, "Well that's not cool." I wanted to laugh and cry at the same time. Resilient, brave and well spoken...all at age 5.

Sunday

Today we visited Tienanmen Square, the Forbidden City and the Summer Palace. It was a beautiful sunny day. Above are pictures of Chairman Mao's mausoleum, me inside the Forbidden City, the Emperor's throne, and Guan Yin from the Summer Palace that was built by the Empress Cixi, who took a job at the Forbidden City as a maid and walked out the Empress of China. Chinese people don't like her very much but it's hard not to admire her, and her Summer home. The first car ever imported into China is still there.

Saturday

Here I am at the Ming Tombs. I am touching the nose of one of the sons of the Dragon. He never became a "real" dragon like his dad, but he is very strong and good at lifting heavy things. Touching his nose brings prosperity to your offspring, so this is for Aslen and Nan. The writing above is in Manchurian and Mandarin, even though the Ming Dynasty was the last Han-lead empire.

After this we visited a Cloisonne factory and then the Great Wall. My camera died so I'm going to post some pictures from other people later. The climb up the Great Wall was breath-taking in every way.

Friday at Ericsson and Microsoft

I had a very busy day today. I learned all about how Ericsson has positioned themselves in the Chinese market and about what Microsoft has to do to employ the worlds best R&D talent. In between I had lunch at a very old home from a noble Chinese family and drove past the "Bird's Nest" Olympic stadium. Then I had another 10 course dinner at a restaurant that featured traditional Chinese musicians. It was a fun and busy day...tomorrow I scale the Great Wall!!

Game On in Beijing

Well, I'm happy to be back in China. I got some sleep on the plane and I'm ready to explore. I'm staying at the Regent and the room couldn't be better. I have a lovely view of the Lamborghini dealership. The traffic isn't nearly as bad as it was in Nanjing (maybe I'm in a good area) but somehow there is the same level of honking. I will try to take some pictures and write more later.

Home Now

We're back. We're going to get caught up on our sleep and hopefully establish a routine over the next few weeks. We have alot to do, but we've already made great strides. We will be staying close to home until we feel that Nan has attached well. She's on her way.

Trying to Leave Early

A pox on China Southern Airlines! We think we are leaving tonight after the swearing ceremony. The nicest thing I can say about China Southern is they are difficult. No it's not a language barrier or a cultural thing, we were calling L.A.

Once again Nan looks and feels fine but bad days are scary and I'd like to see Dr Scharff, the greatest pediatrician ever. Asside from health issues, she had a tantrum/pouty day yesterday. I think the issue is that all three of us (me, Aslen and Nan) all have the same internal dialogue..."No one understands what's going on here except me, why can't these other two see that?"

Dallas has been great, he was up until 3:00AM cussing at China Southern.

Sunday in the park

Here we are in the park at Shamian Island. Nan is warming up to me. She's learning English quickly and was yelling "Hello!" while playing hide-and-seek. She and Aslen are true sisters, fighting over who gets to push the buttons in the elevator, sharing snacks and giggling. Yes Nan is shooting the peace sign at the camera. Don't know where she learned that but she does it often.

Today (Sunday) we went to visit a Buddist temple that is 700 years old. A monk-type guy was performing a blessing ritual so Aslen and Nan were officially blessed. He sang a song that sounded exactly the way you are imagining it would sound and flicked some water on their heads. Then I practiced my negotiation skills at the jade market. I'm torn because if you don't negotiate then you insult them but it's hard to forget that we're only haggling over a few dollars, and I'd really like them to have a few extra bucks. If I walk away looking like a sucker then so be it, they need the money more then I need to pay $1 less for a bracelet.

I really like it here. There are many Americans so we don't draw crowds when we go out or get a dozen camera phones flashed at us. People still want to touch Aslen's hair though. People come out of their shops to give her fans or dolls. Then we have to buy the same for Nan so there are no hard feelings (I think the shop keepers have this trick down) It's a nice rainy day, very misty and cool. Plus there is a Starbucks around the corner from the market for live eels and turtles (not a pet store). Tonight we are joining the other families for an authentic Cantonese meal. BTW, we had Thai for lunch yesterday and Nan ate about half of my green curry chicken. I figured it would be too hot for her but she loved it.

What a lovely place

Our computer situation is different here so I'm not sure if we'll be able to post more pictures or not. We are on Shamian Island, and most of the architecture is British Colonial style. The banyon trees are 100-300 years old and moss hangs from their droopy branches. It reminds me of St Augustine. The roof across the street from our window has peacocks, ostriches and a goat. The feel is very different from Nanjing, which reminded me of Manhatten but with more dangerous drivers.

Nan is very smart. She looks around now and sees lots of white families with little Chinese girls. Everywhere there are people from Australia, London, Germany, all with little Chinese girls. Our coordinator here is much more conscious of her bonding issues and pushes her back to us if she tries to buddy up to her. Those cues will help Nan understand she belongs with us. It's really funny when she corrects my Chinese.

We have a water filtration tap in the room that has instructions written on it as follows:

"Typical Monkeys move quickly through life. Tumbling from one intriguing situation to the next. Impressing others with their intelligence and wit, Monkeys are sociable, confident, restless, and curious. Monkeys dread routine and thrive on change. Monkeys are sometimes accused of being manipulative. They laugh at these charges! Can they help it if they are quick on the up take? They need stimulation. Monkeys in love expect the unexpected and lose interest when love gets too predictable."

I feel like the tap is trying to reach out to me, but I don't understand how it works. I'm not good with metaphorical instructions. Is the tap the monkey? Is the water the monkey? Am I the monkey? For now we'll stick with bottled water.

Guangzhou

We just arrived in Guangzhou. We are at the Victory Hotel and we love it. It's very charming and we have a wonderful view of the river. Flight and taxi ride were both uneventful. Not sure when we will meet our coordinators here, but hopefully soon.

Aslen wants to say hello to Blake, Emma and all her teachers from Dobson Montessori. She is looking for the "perfect show-and-tell" item.

Wagons South

Today we leave Nanjing and go to Guangzhou for the consulate appt. Nan has never been on a plane before so we'll see how this goes. As long as Aslen is with her she should be fine. Now that she isn't taking antibiotics or jumping on her bed for hours her urine has cleared.

Last night we had dinner with Linda Huang, who does orphanage visits for waiting families. Linda is also one of the nicest people I've ever met. She said that Nan's Mandarin has an "American accent" now, which means she's started droping her inflection tones. When we went to the indoor pool to play, a lady came over and was talking to all of us in English. We told her Nan spoke Mandarin so she asked Nan if she spoke Mandarin and Nan shook her head "No." :)

Nan is by far the tidiest Caldwell. Shirley is now second. Bud and Dallas are still tied for last. Before she eats or after she goes potty, she gets up on a stool and washes her hands up to her elbows twice, but she looks like a surgeon she scrubs everything and puts soap on both hands. She washes her face, then she washes the entire vanity and dries it. She gets very angry if you try to interrupt her or help. Linda said the orphanage was very strict about cleanliness.

At the Nanjing Wall

Well, I've decided not to get worked up about the bladder stones until we get home. Any day that does not involve a Chinese hospital is a wonderful day! Although my coordinator, Mr Li who accompanied us to the hospital, is one of the best people I've ever met. He told me that the Plum Blossom Festival would begin next week in Nanjing. The Plum Blossom is the flower of Nanjing. He said that Nan was a true Nanjing girl because like the Plum Blossom, she is the only flower capable of blooming in the most adverse of conditions. Not many flowers can bloom in the freezing Nanjing winter. Today at the Nanjing Museum I bought a silk brocade of a Plum Blossom tree for her.

Today we got a tour of the Nanjing city wall. It was built 700 years ago. It's was ordered by the founder of the Ming dynasty. It's 5 stories tall and each brick used to build it is numbered and has the name of the brick maker on it for "quality control" purposes. There are actually two walls, the one in front is lower and easier to breach. If an enemy army broke through the the wooden gate, a stone one was dropped via mechanical wench behind them and on each side so they would be trapped. It was a strategy called "beating dogs behind a bolted door." Chinese people really know how to name things. The picture above is Nan on top of the wall.

At the SWI

While I was at the hospital, where there were no pictures taken, Dallas and Aslen got a whirlwind tour of Nan's home for the last 4+ years. Above are Dallas and Aslen by Nan's old bed, and then a picture of Nan's classmates. According to Dallas the visit was very structured and they did not allow them to ask any questions from the question list or take pictures from the picture list. Dallas left the picture list with Coco who said she would e-mail Dallas pictures of all the children listed. We were very disappointed.



Nan and Aslen are getting along great. Nan and Dallas are getting along great. But I have managed to adopt the only Chinese person who doesn't like me. I think she is mad at me for taking her to the hospital. It was a tough morning for her. Tomorrow is another day

Bladder Stones

Nan has a 7mm bladder stone. I know she isn't a 65 year old guy with prostate issues, but I have it on tape. It's pretty common in children in developing countries. So we spent the morning at the hospital. We're going to try to get back earlier if possible, we'll see what we can do. She's still going potty okay so if anything changes we'll go back to the hospital.

We had so much fun yesterday at the Civil Affairs office that we decided to go back today. Nan's orphanage director was there and the scene started shaping up similar to yesterday. She snuggled up to the director and wouldn't look at us. The director was talking to her in Mandarin and Nan kept shaking her head. Then suddenly she was back to the girl we got to know the night before. The director left and everything was fine. Our coordinator told us that the director told Nan that since she didn't want her family, was it okay to let another little girl go home with us. Nan told the director that she liked her family just fine and didn't want any other kids to have us. (Apparently they play hardball in China) It's not the approach I would've taken, but the director put her in the position to choose us, and she did. The adoption certificate was signed and Nan's official name is now Brennan Xiao Caldwell.

The director advised us not to visit the orphanage with Nan. Tomorrow Dallas will go visit alone and take pictures of the waiting children and get whatever updates we can.

Gotcha Day

Here we are at Gotcha Day. By the time we left the Civil Affairs Office everyone was crying. Nan was terrified. She screamed at us, threw her bracelet at us and cried for her Nannies to come save her. It was by far one of the toughest mornings I've ever had. Our coordinator said we would have a very tough night. I knew Nan was my daughter when she tried to take me out with a right hook on the floor of the Civil Affairs Office. We were meant to be!

Back at the hotel, after screaming herself to sleep, Nan woke up pretty subdued after her nap. She and Aslen took a bath and Dallas and I dried her off, put lotion on her and got her dressed. I put on her stride rite shoes that light up when you stomp them and it was the first smile she ever gave me. (Should've known the way to her heart would be shoes) She seemed to like her new clothes. The coordinator came back to the hotel room to help us complete some paperwork and I anticipated another monster tantrum, but she let Anna come and go without begging her to save her. We decided to push our luck and take the girls toy shopping. Nan took my hand and didn't let go until dinner. She ate very well and smiled at me alot. Back at the hotel room Aslen and Nan played with their toys while Dr. Gong examined Nan. She has an ear infection so he brought us some drops and medicine. Nan started laughing and running, dancing and playing. She says "hello" "shoes" "Aslen" and "water." Right now she and Aslen are giggling and pretending to try to go to sleep. They are turning into sisters quickly.

What a day...

We're here

We just got to our hotel. Dallas and Jolean's luggage did not make it all the way to Nanjing. Somehow Aslen and Brennan's luggage did. As luck would have it we're across the street from a mall, where I was worshiped as a goddess. We're definately a minority here. Everyone stares at us and if Aslen's head is within arms reach the older people will compulsively touch her hair. We're waiting to hear from our coordinators and find out how the week will go. Hopefully our luggage will show up soon. We'll write more later.

Message from Brennan

"I want to wear a dress. Come get me faster. I miss you."

The Year of the Mickey Mouse

In a few weeks it will be the year of the rat but cute, plush rat toys are rare, so we went with Mickey Mouse. Brennan is sitting next to her Ayi. Linda Huang took this picture for us yesterday. She is a coordinator and also has business called China In Country Assistance Services. Her website is http://www.china-ias.com/. She provides many services to adopting families.

Linda said that Brennan is VERY excited about coming home. She requested "apples, oranges and skirts." She's a west coast girl already! We will leave on Feb 15th and will meet Brennan on Feb 18th.

We have approval to travel!!

We are waiting for confirmation of our consulate appointment, but it looks like we will leave for China on February 15th! So just like Sabra, I'll be getting another daughter for my birthday! No new pictures or updates. We will be the next to travel and bring updates to other families who are waiting. I guess this is really going to happen!